“…Beauty is any quality by which an object or a form pleases a beholder.”
Will Durant, Our Oriental Heritage, p. 82
December 30
Five notes with comments from Will Durant in Our Oriental Heritage, pages 82—217
“In Nigeria, says Mungo Park, ‘corpulence and beauty seem to be terms nearly synonymous. A woman of even moderate pretensions must be one who cannot walk without a slave under each arm to support her, and a perfect beauty is a load for a camel.’” (Until modern times, corpulence in many societies was a sign of conspicuous wealth. Today in America it is the wealthy who are trim and the poor who tend toward obesity. The former display their power through mere reputation or gaudy opulence, or both; the latter put on the pounds because of a diet rich in carbohydrates and sweets. Neither group rides camels.)
“Jewelry is one of the most ancient elements of civilization; in tombs twenty thousand years old, shells and teeth have been found strung into necklaces.” (I include this observation by Durant for those parents who collect the baby teeth of their children. Preserve those miniature bones, string them together, and someday you will have the perfect gift for your child’s significant other.)
Will Durant, Our Oriental Heritage, p. 82
December 30
Five notes with comments from Will Durant in Our Oriental Heritage, pages 82—217
“In Nigeria, says Mungo Park, ‘corpulence and beauty seem to be terms nearly synonymous. A woman of even moderate pretensions must be one who cannot walk without a slave under each arm to support her, and a perfect beauty is a load for a camel.’” (Until modern times, corpulence in many societies was a sign of conspicuous wealth. Today in America it is the wealthy who are trim and the poor who tend toward obesity. The former display their power through mere reputation or gaudy opulence, or both; the latter put on the pounds because of a diet rich in carbohydrates and sweets. Neither group rides camels.)
“Jewelry is one of the most ancient elements of civilization; in tombs twenty thousand years old, shells and teeth have been found strung into necklaces.” (I include this observation by Durant for those parents who collect the baby teeth of their children. Preserve those miniature bones, string them together, and someday you will have the perfect gift for your child’s significant other.)
“The remains (of Egyptian women in tombs) abound in toilet sets, mirrors, razors, hair-curlers, hair-pins, combs, cosmetic boxes, dishes and spoons….” (To the ladies, as well as to any interested gentlemen, a suggestion: be sure to pack a bag of cosmetics to take with you into the grave. Three thousand years from now, you will not only delight some archaeologist, but you will also give rise to speculation about your vanity and your belief in an afterlife where rouge and lipstick appear a necessity.)
“When she (Queen Hatshepsut of Egypt) appeared in public she dressed in male garb, and wore a beard.” (This remarkable monarch was neither an early cross-dresser nor a victim of androgen excess. Egypt was supposed to have kings; Hatshepsut was merely trying to oblige. The clothes were part of her shtick, the beard fake. More discussion of ancient and modern sex later).
“A nation is born stoic, and dies epicurean.” (In simpler language, a nation is born hard and dies soft. Read the story of America’s founding, of its pioneers and activists, and compare them to your contemporaries. Are we hard or soft? In an online essay on smoking, Sarah Hoyt uses her friend John Ringo’s signature line to mark a contrast between now and fifty years ago: “We went to the moon on coffee, bourbon and Marlboros. We're not going to Mars on Evian and tofu.”)
To spend a year or two in Asheville, North Carolina—and I spent eleven years—inures one to gaudy tattoos and piercings. Women stroll the sidewalks in sleeveless blouses with blue tattoos stretching from their wrists to their shoulders; men grunt and strain in the weight room at the Y, biceps bulging with hearts, dragons, swords, and mermaids; the nose ring is as common a sight as the rising sun.
Throughout Our Oriental Heritage—and I have beaten a path to the chapter on Assyrian history—Will Durant gives us not just the history of the wars, rulers, and politics, but observations on culture as well. He describes some of the jewelry, paints, and piercings of early human beings, demonstrating the importance of personal decoration even to peoples who hunted their game with flint and who followed herds of game without wheel or horse. He conducts us into Egyptian powder rooms, and gives us an idea of what the well-dressed Assyrian might have worn three thousand years ago. From my reading, I gather we moderns and ancients share a fascination with ornamental accoutrements. An Egyptian scribe of the Middle Kingdom, a Sioux warrior in 1800, the New Zealand natives whose women left the noses of Captain Cook’s sailors colored red or yellow from their face paints: all were as passionate about make-up and “bling” as are we.
In some of these ancient societies, both men and women delighted in cosmetics. Today the situation is different. Though some modern men may trouble themselves with hair coloring or visits to a manicurist, and some few have even begun wearing makeup, it is the women who drive the cosmetics industry and who are most concerned with artificial embellishments. Those who doubt this contention have only to visit a department store, Belk’s for example, and compare the size and luxury of the women’s cosmetic counters to the Spartan goods found on the shelves designated for men.
Moreover, most men have limited (that is putting it mildly) knowledge about the uses of the various cosmetics and polishes found in these fashion emporiums. Ask us what we think makes for a good foundation, for instance, and we men will envision the concrete floor of a basement. In the film What Women Want, the scene where a philandering adman (Mel Gibson) experiments with women’s makeup is humorous precisely because this man who prides himself on his sexual conquests is so ignorant of female cosmetics.
Occasionally, we males do manage to impress women by presenting a desired perfume or piece of jewelry as a gift. In my case, I once enjoyed a minor triumph in the arena of nail polish. Five or six years ago, I spent an evening with a woman who, like some of her sex, was excited about her just-manicured and painted nails. “Lincoln Park After Dark,” she said, wiggling her fingers before my eyes. The following week, while I was teaching a class of homeschoolers, a sixteen-year-old reached for an essay I was handing her. When I saw her nails, I said, “Lincoln Park After Dark.” The kid nearly fell out of chair, knocked over that any male could know such a thing. On receiving the news, her mother was so impressed that she telephoned to ask how I had recognized the nail polish.
But that was a fluke. Normally, fingernails are far down the list of what I notice in a female.
And what of Goog, the Paleo Man? Was he as clueless as to the mix of clay and dye his partner dabbed on her eyelids and cheeks? Could the captain of a Phoenician galley tell you how his wife darkened her eyelids and reddened her lips? Ashurbanipal, the great and powerful Assyrian king, left us a long list of his accomplishments, ranging from “holding the reins like a charioteer” to following “the royal ways.” Nowhere in this list does Ashurbanipal mention his expertise regarding the function of the bottles and vases on his wife’s dressing table. Did he understand how his queen made her eyelashes appear longer or how she pleated her hair?
Gambling is one vice to which I am not attracted. Were I a betting man, however, I would wager a bag of gold coins from the mint of Croesus that ancient males were as ignorant as I about the implements and chemicals of the boudoir.
“When she (Queen Hatshepsut of Egypt) appeared in public she dressed in male garb, and wore a beard.” (This remarkable monarch was neither an early cross-dresser nor a victim of androgen excess. Egypt was supposed to have kings; Hatshepsut was merely trying to oblige. The clothes were part of her shtick, the beard fake. More discussion of ancient and modern sex later).
“A nation is born stoic, and dies epicurean.” (In simpler language, a nation is born hard and dies soft. Read the story of America’s founding, of its pioneers and activists, and compare them to your contemporaries. Are we hard or soft? In an online essay on smoking, Sarah Hoyt uses her friend John Ringo’s signature line to mark a contrast between now and fifty years ago: “We went to the moon on coffee, bourbon and Marlboros. We're not going to Mars on Evian and tofu.”)
To spend a year or two in Asheville, North Carolina—and I spent eleven years—inures one to gaudy tattoos and piercings. Women stroll the sidewalks in sleeveless blouses with blue tattoos stretching from their wrists to their shoulders; men grunt and strain in the weight room at the Y, biceps bulging with hearts, dragons, swords, and mermaids; the nose ring is as common a sight as the rising sun.
Throughout Our Oriental Heritage—and I have beaten a path to the chapter on Assyrian history—Will Durant gives us not just the history of the wars, rulers, and politics, but observations on culture as well. He describes some of the jewelry, paints, and piercings of early human beings, demonstrating the importance of personal decoration even to peoples who hunted their game with flint and who followed herds of game without wheel or horse. He conducts us into Egyptian powder rooms, and gives us an idea of what the well-dressed Assyrian might have worn three thousand years ago. From my reading, I gather we moderns and ancients share a fascination with ornamental accoutrements. An Egyptian scribe of the Middle Kingdom, a Sioux warrior in 1800, the New Zealand natives whose women left the noses of Captain Cook’s sailors colored red or yellow from their face paints: all were as passionate about make-up and “bling” as are we.
In some of these ancient societies, both men and women delighted in cosmetics. Today the situation is different. Though some modern men may trouble themselves with hair coloring or visits to a manicurist, and some few have even begun wearing makeup, it is the women who drive the cosmetics industry and who are most concerned with artificial embellishments. Those who doubt this contention have only to visit a department store, Belk’s for example, and compare the size and luxury of the women’s cosmetic counters to the Spartan goods found on the shelves designated for men.
Moreover, most men have limited (that is putting it mildly) knowledge about the uses of the various cosmetics and polishes found in these fashion emporiums. Ask us what we think makes for a good foundation, for instance, and we men will envision the concrete floor of a basement. In the film What Women Want, the scene where a philandering adman (Mel Gibson) experiments with women’s makeup is humorous precisely because this man who prides himself on his sexual conquests is so ignorant of female cosmetics.
Occasionally, we males do manage to impress women by presenting a desired perfume or piece of jewelry as a gift. In my case, I once enjoyed a minor triumph in the arena of nail polish. Five or six years ago, I spent an evening with a woman who, like some of her sex, was excited about her just-manicured and painted nails. “Lincoln Park After Dark,” she said, wiggling her fingers before my eyes. The following week, while I was teaching a class of homeschoolers, a sixteen-year-old reached for an essay I was handing her. When I saw her nails, I said, “Lincoln Park After Dark.” The kid nearly fell out of chair, knocked over that any male could know such a thing. On receiving the news, her mother was so impressed that she telephoned to ask how I had recognized the nail polish.
But that was a fluke. Normally, fingernails are far down the list of what I notice in a female.
And what of Goog, the Paleo Man? Was he as clueless as to the mix of clay and dye his partner dabbed on her eyelids and cheeks? Could the captain of a Phoenician galley tell you how his wife darkened her eyelids and reddened her lips? Ashurbanipal, the great and powerful Assyrian king, left us a long list of his accomplishments, ranging from “holding the reins like a charioteer” to following “the royal ways.” Nowhere in this list does Ashurbanipal mention his expertise regarding the function of the bottles and vases on his wife’s dressing table. Did he understand how his queen made her eyelashes appear longer or how she pleated her hair?
Gambling is one vice to which I am not attracted. Were I a betting man, however, I would wager a bag of gold coins from the mint of Croesus that ancient males were as ignorant as I about the implements and chemicals of the boudoir.