“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
Friedrich Nietzsche
That much quoted sentence from Nietzsche should be a candle in the cave to anyone stumbling around in the dark, lost and confused, beaten down by adversity, and caught up in a routine seemingly empty of meaning and hope.
Joe, age 27, works as an apprentice carpenter. Every weekday morning he leaves his mobile home at seven and drives into town, where he joins an on-site construction crew. Joe works hard, learns quickly, and has earned the respect of his foreman and the others in his crew. At five o’clock, he returns home to his girlfriend and her two children. Miranda’s alcoholic husband deserted her two years earlier, and she and her children, ages four and three, have lived for a year with Joe.
Friedrich Nietzsche
That much quoted sentence from Nietzsche should be a candle in the cave to anyone stumbling around in the dark, lost and confused, beaten down by adversity, and caught up in a routine seemingly empty of meaning and hope.
Joe, age 27, works as an apprentice carpenter. Every weekday morning he leaves his mobile home at seven and drives into town, where he joins an on-site construction crew. Joe works hard, learns quickly, and has earned the respect of his foreman and the others in his crew. At five o’clock, he returns home to his girlfriend and her two children. Miranda’s alcoholic husband deserted her two years earlier, and she and her children, ages four and three, have lived for a year with Joe.
On his arrival this evening, Joe kisses Miranda, sweeps Stevie and Jessica into his arms, breaks out the building blocks and PlayMobile, and helps them construct a town on the living room floor. Later, after supper, he and Miranda bath the kids, dress them for bed, and read them The Runaway Bunny. Once they have the children asleep, they watch some television, discussing during the commercials the money Miranda spent buying the kids clothes at Goodwill, how to make another payment on the Master Card bill, and whether they can afford to take Stevie to a doctor for his persistent cough. Exhausted and fraught with worry, they go to bed and fall asleep holding hands.
By the standards of our age, Joe is a decent man. During his early twenties he bounced along some rocky roads, but he has shaped up these last three years. He loves Miranda, Stevie, and Jessica, and tries to do his best by them. He and the bank own the trailer in which he lives. He is learning a trade. He faces his financial responsibilities with a maturity lacking in some of his contemporaries.
Sometimes, though, a fog of despair slips over Joe. Despite his efforts, he and Miranda live close to the bone, and seem unable to get ahead. Often life is a slog, dragging him down, his legs shackled, weights on his shoulders. Often, too, he wonders if these circumstances will ever change.
Joe knows what he must do. He must work hard to keep food on the table and a roof over their heads.
He also knows how to do these things. He must labor and learn every day, and thereby gain those skills that will bring him more money and greater job satisfaction. He knows how to love a woman and care for her children.
What he doesn’t have firmly cinched onto his tool belt is the why.
What is the meaning of his all this work and worry?
When we lack a “why” in our lives, when our lives lack meaning, we are looking through a glass darkly.
The things we do and how we do them function best when they have a why planted behind them. If we know why we are alive, if we know why we are pursuing certain goals or goods, then the burdens of life can become challenges and adventures.
Some people apprehend the why in their lives.
The devout of any faith believe that a supreme being directs their what and their how. All that they accomplish during the day, from washing the supper dishes to educating their children, brings glory and honor to their god. That deity is their “why.”
Others find their meaning in philosophy or in personal codes of honor. They see the big picture. They see past the tasks and obligations, and realize they own their power to make a difference, however large or small, and so make the world a better place.
To possess this knowledge not only strengthens but also ennobles a man like Joe. There he sits in that trailer, his life jumbled with kids and a woman, straining every muscle to pay his bills and help in whatever possible way those he loves. Day by day, one small step at a time, he is making the world a better place. If he recognizes this, if he discovers his own meaning of life, his despair dissipates, and he breaks free of those shackles and weights.
Look for the deep meaning in your own life. And when you find it, hang that “why” before you like that long-ago pillar of fire the Hebrews followed in the desert.
Then you are truly on your way.
By the standards of our age, Joe is a decent man. During his early twenties he bounced along some rocky roads, but he has shaped up these last three years. He loves Miranda, Stevie, and Jessica, and tries to do his best by them. He and the bank own the trailer in which he lives. He is learning a trade. He faces his financial responsibilities with a maturity lacking in some of his contemporaries.
Sometimes, though, a fog of despair slips over Joe. Despite his efforts, he and Miranda live close to the bone, and seem unable to get ahead. Often life is a slog, dragging him down, his legs shackled, weights on his shoulders. Often, too, he wonders if these circumstances will ever change.
Joe knows what he must do. He must work hard to keep food on the table and a roof over their heads.
He also knows how to do these things. He must labor and learn every day, and thereby gain those skills that will bring him more money and greater job satisfaction. He knows how to love a woman and care for her children.
What he doesn’t have firmly cinched onto his tool belt is the why.
What is the meaning of his all this work and worry?
When we lack a “why” in our lives, when our lives lack meaning, we are looking through a glass darkly.
The things we do and how we do them function best when they have a why planted behind them. If we know why we are alive, if we know why we are pursuing certain goals or goods, then the burdens of life can become challenges and adventures.
Some people apprehend the why in their lives.
The devout of any faith believe that a supreme being directs their what and their how. All that they accomplish during the day, from washing the supper dishes to educating their children, brings glory and honor to their god. That deity is their “why.”
Others find their meaning in philosophy or in personal codes of honor. They see the big picture. They see past the tasks and obligations, and realize they own their power to make a difference, however large or small, and so make the world a better place.
To possess this knowledge not only strengthens but also ennobles a man like Joe. There he sits in that trailer, his life jumbled with kids and a woman, straining every muscle to pay his bills and help in whatever possible way those he loves. Day by day, one small step at a time, he is making the world a better place. If he recognizes this, if he discovers his own meaning of life, his despair dissipates, and he breaks free of those shackles and weights.
Look for the deep meaning in your own life. And when you find it, hang that “why” before you like that long-ago pillar of fire the Hebrews followed in the desert.
Then you are truly on your way.
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